Is Cuffing Season Over?
DC Plus Size Blogger

A few months ago I posted a blog about the ways to respond to “hey stranger” messages as you prepare for cuffing season, read here. Now we are weeks away from Easter and Cuffing Season is over. The winter was not very cold this year, there weren’t too many storm so there may not be as many October of November babies as expected. My Cuffing Season has failed to produce an adequate human space heater, I am thankful to global warming because I didn’t freeze to death.

As we enter spring it is time for a reevaluation of the single life game plan. Don’t worry you will still get “Hey Stranger” message from unwanted suitors but you may have to be strategic in how you throw those curve balls. Some of you may have been working on your summer bodies and are ready to reveal them, while the rest of us (me included) have just accepted that God makes no mistakes in his creations and will just flaunt it! Either way these guys will come for you even when you don’t send for them.

The Ex-Boyfriend

Dammmm Daniel, again with the ex-boyfriend! So you just posted a picture of yourself looking as good as a thanksgiving dinner and here he go, like clockwork, sending you a message. He knows your weakness so he may invite you to a BBQ, a beach trip or for margaritas at your favorite restaurant; AVOID HIM! Girl he is the bubonic plague and you don’t want those troubles, the future of Obamacare is still unsure. Keep pushing pass him and eventually he will get the picture, hopefully.

Joanne the scammer

 

Social Media Heartthrob

So yall met virtually from a Facebook group (GroupMe, Insta, Twitter etc) and now its warm enough for you to want to ensure a meet up. He may have been cool on the internet but projecting coolness thru social media is easy. Don’t be disappointed if you meet and you are more than disturbed but the shell of a man who presents himself. But, allow me to be optimistic, he may be just as awesome as he came off online and things can get off to a great start. Keep in mind that Facebook is on of the biggest dating sites and he may have a rolodex full of bright eyed girls such as yourself, tread lightly…actually tip-top into this situationship he may be the type of guy to sub-tweet you using memes. 

#Festivalbae

This summer I plan on going to Broccoli city festival and I am pretty sure that there will be plenty of potential baes out there singing along to Solange with me. There are plenty of awesome festivals going on across the country and if you plan on attending there is a chance you will meet #festivalbae. Exchange numbers and enjoy the festivities, he will seem perfect in the moment so enjoy it, tomorrow is not promised. Your love for the same band/artist may not translate into a love for each other. Keep things casual and friendly you may run into him at other summer events, or he may be the plug to get you and the girls into that sold out event, think wisely we got moves to make.

#Africanbae

I woke up and all of a sudden everyone had an African bae. Whether he’s Nigerian, Ghanaian, Cameroonian or from one of the other flavors of the motherland you still gotta watch it. Don’t let those BellaNaija wedding pictures fool you into thinking African Bae guarantees you a life of Azonto dancing with a side of pounded yams and pepper soup. Make sure that he is not in the “sowing his royal oats” stage of life. Personally I have been praying to Jesus and all the saints above to send me a West African King but I know God works on his own time so I will practice patience. But if you find yours before I do, send me a wedding invite and the Asoebi fabric.

Summer love can be so fun and I hope you can find some in a hopeless place, but have your guards up because when temperatures rise over 70 degrees it does something to the brain.